As we approach the new year, I encourage women as I have my daughters and will continue to teach them: To love yourself more. To let go of any man who clearly shows that he will never be who you need, want and deserve. You are smart and beautiful. Be at peace in the place you are in. Often times we seek to find something or someone, outside of where we should never have ventured. Love does not always love you back. That does not mean however, that you should settle because you are in love for the sake of love. The love that reflects yours often is right there in your reach, ready and willing to reciprocate. You’ve just been too busy reaching for the wrong one.
Don’t step out of bounds, know your boundaries, your borders and let no one tell you any differently. This means, you will not compromise and step over a line you said you never would. You know better, so act better! A man who wants you, will willingly step inside your borders, your boundaries, to show you he respects your position, he respects you, he wants you to feel safe and comfortable. He understands it’s not to keep the right person out but all the wrong ones and to protect you. There will be times when you will have a crush on someone and even love someone who just doesn’t feel the same, recognize it, accept it and move on.
You will most likely, like most others have, play the fool in love but don’t play for long. Staying doesn’t increase your chances of finally losing the fool’s title. Chances are you will only lose yourself. Forgive and try hard to forget the pain. You’ll have to free yourself of it all to allow others in and to live your life well and to its fullest. Never, however, forget the lesson you were meant to learn. Know that what it takes to get a man, is never what will keep him. You’ll learn, the man who stays is the man who wants to. A woman, can’t keep a man who doesn’t want to be kept. A kept man is one who wants to be kept. Therefore, don’t waste your time trying. However, do be the best woman, girlfriend, wife you can be. The previously stated does not exempt you from this. Most of all, be happy with YOU.
originally written December 31, 2017